I always say I have one of the best jobs on the planet ( and it does not feel like a “job” per se because of it) . and this is that I get to talk to men all week every week where they share with me what often they do not tell anyone else.
I get a different version of themselves.Not the one that they reserve to perform for the world. I get to sit in front of the version that is often hidden for way too long.
The version they have often not felt safe enough to share with anyone.
When I ask the question of what they truly want in a relationship, i hear over and over that they “want to feel desired.” Not just loved or appreciated, respected or that they are a good provider etc….. But.. desired.
They want to feel Wanted.
They also want to feel Chosen . Men also want to have someone that looks at them and feels something…..electric. A look that says you, specifically you, do something to me.
For some of the men i speak to, it takes a bit to admit as if wanting to be desired is somehow less masculine than simply being the one who does the desiring.
and meanwhile, on the other side of the bed are their women consumed with being desirable. With the outfit, the gym sculptured body, the lashes and hair and the way they look when they walk in the room. Women concerned with whether their partner still finds them appealing. Beautiful, intelligent, loving women who are absolutely consumed with being desirable.
Whilst a woman is conditioned and marinated from birth how her worth lies in how desirable she is, her man is laying next to her aching to feel this as well..from her.
What can happen is that while women are busy worrying about whether they are desired, they are often not actually doing the desiring. And their man sitting across from them, or lying next to them in the dark is starving for exactly that.
In all my years of coaching men, this is one of the most consistent and heartbreaking threads I see being pulled at a mans heart..that he does not feel desired his partner.
They feel tolerated.
They feel like the initiator always the one reaching, asking and hoping for connection. They often feel like sex is something that their partner agrees to rather than wants to initiate or reaches for. They feel, in the most tender and unspoken part of themselves, invisible in their desirability. And because men are conditioned to not need this because it is akin to weakness or neediness or something vaguely embarrassing, they often do not say it.
…..so lovers….. lovers of men…can you imagine what is the most delicious and powerful way to desire your man ?
through his cock……...
A man’s Cock is not separate from his identity, his confidence or from his sense of self. A Man’s cock is not something that exists purely for function or performance as it carries the full weight of his vulnerability. The cock is the barametor of his life… every fear of inadequacy, every moment of shame, every time his body did not respond the way he willed it to, every cruel joke the culture has made at his expense, the mission he is or is not following…. etc etc…
He has been compared, measured, judged, and reduced to a punchline more times than any of us stop to reckon with.
And underneath all of that, the bravado and the silence, most men have a relationship with this part of themselves, with their cock, that is far more tender, far more complicated, and far more wounded than they will ever admit.
Which is exactly why honouring a man’s cock, truly honouring him, with presence and reverence and genuine delight, is one of the most profoundly healing things a partner can offer.
To honour this part of a man that has often not been allowed to simply be received without pressure or expectation or an agenda. This is devotional.
It communicates, at a level that bypasses words entirely and lets your man know that he is safe. every single part of him… even the parts he may have been most afraid to show.
And from that place, that place of being truly met without judgment or demand, a man can open in ways that transform not just the bedroom, but the entire relationship.
yyyuuuummm
oh and it is highly erotic and sexy as all f*ck…..
For the Ladies whom are wanting to gift your man this adoration and devour him this way….I created teh puuurrfect short sexy program for you
Get yourself into Oral Pleasure Mastery HERE
mmhhh
Always with pleasure
M
❤️
PS……. if you are one of the peeps completely slammed by Mercury retrograde this time around…I FFFEEEEELLLLL you..oh my gawd I do…. you may have noticed i have not been sending my juicy emails…for a bit…i was locked out of my accounts, my computer died and i lost…a truck load of”stuff”…. but…I am coming back slowly….i did what i know best to do and that was to go to the mountains and rivers…
So you will be hearing more of me again.
xxxx
Melissa Louise is an UPLVL Coach working with men, women, and couples on emotional truth, nervous system safety, and the kind of intimacy that actually nourishes. To work with Me, hit reply to this email or book a discovery call HERE
x